For 20 years The Mr. T Experience has been my favorite band of all time. I discovered them in high school and remember picking up their CD because they were on the same indie label (Lookout! Records) as Green Day… and I liked Green Day so why not?

Well, I immediately LOVED The Mr. T Experience. Their long running discography of “songs about girls” sincerely felt like the soundtrack to my frustrated, self-depricating geek life, with song titles like “I’m Like Yeah, But She’s All No” and “Even Hitler Had A Girlfriend”. Using my college radio connections, I eventually became acquaintances with the band and their songwriting front man, Frank Portman, whose words helped shape my own storytelling quite a bit. But in 2004, The Mr. T Experience put out their last album (and one of the last ones ever released by Lookout!), Yesterday Rules.

As the years clicked by, I thought that was it. Frank moved on to a career as a Young Adult author, publishing his novels King Dork and Andromeda Klein (both of which you should read). I loved the books, but as an MTX fan, I wanted some music to go along with the stories.

Well, the day has come! Last year I had Frank on Geekscape to talk about the release of his follow up to King Dork, King Dork Approximately, and the accompanying song that went along with it (the first MTX release in over 10 years). He told me he planned an entire album as a soundtrack to the King Dork books. And I immediately told him that I wanted to shoot a music video for it. As a storyteller, it was my way of giving back to the storyteller who had helped me along the way!

So I present to you our music video for The Mr. T Experience song ‘High School Is the Penalty for Transgressions Yet to Be Specified’, heavily influenced in a literary ironic twist by Shirley Jackson’s short story The Lottery (and the short film based on it as well). Hell, The Hunger Games used it as an influence so why couldn’t I!?!

Enjoy the video and if you enjoy it, I implore you all to pick up King Dork Approximately (and King Dork) and give it a read. It’s now on paperback for $9.99 and comes with a FREE copy of the new Mr. T Experience album… something I’d been waiting for for over a decade! And read on for the press release!

High School Is the Penalty for Transgressions Yet to Be Specified,” is the second single from The Mr T Experience’s long-awaited new album, “King Dork Approximately: the Album” released in connection with the paperback version of “Dr. Frank” Portman‘s YA novel of the same name, the sequel to his 2006 bestseller, King Dork. The album consists of songs “written by” the novel’s rock’n’roll obsessed narrator and performed and recorded by Dr. Frank’s very real band, MTX. The full album is available as a free download with purchase of this edition of the book.

“High School Is..” was directed by Jonathan London, a life long MTX fan who has directed videos for bands such as Reggie and The Full Effect & Reel Big Fish. London is also the editor and chief of Geekscape.net. He was excited to work with Frank on the newest MTX video, “The Mr. T Experience is my favorite band of all time and has been since I discovered ‘Love is Dead’ in a record store 20 years ago! Frank’s writing has been one of the biggest influences in me as a storyteller so I had to be a part of ‘King Dork Approximately’. I got to work with some of my best friends on this project and it was a definite labor of love 2 decades in the making. I’d love to make a video for every song in the MTX catalog!”

KING DORK APPROXIMATELY THE ALBUM available as a free download with purchase of this edition of the book. Release date: Oct. 4, 2016. Order an autographed copy of the book, with a download of the album from Sounds Radical: http://www.soundsradical.com

Coinciding with the release of King Dork Approximately, Dr. Frank will be taking the band on the road with select tour dates across North America!

READ BELOW for a special note from Dr. Frank entitled: “I Wrote Rock and Roll about a Book about Rock and Roll”


Tour Dates:

Fri- Oct 7th– San Francisco at DNA Lounge with Captain 9s & The Knickerbocker Trio, The Four Eyes, & Destroy Boys
Sat- Oct 8th– Sacramento, CA at Blue Lamp with Captain 9s & The Knickerbocker Trio, The O’Mulligans
Sat- Nov 12th– Santa Ana, CA at The Constellation Room with Toys That Kill & The Maxies
Sun- Nov 13th– Los Angeles, CA at Redwood Bar with Toys That Kill & Harry and the Hendersons.
Fri- Dec 9th– SOLD OUT Chicago, IL at Reggie’s with NOBODYS & Reaganomics
Sat- Dec 10th– Green Bay, WI at Lyric Room with NOBODYS

 


“I Wrote Rock and Roll about a Book about Rock and Roll” by Frank Portman

The release date for King Dork Approximately the Paperback and King Dork Approximately the Album is October 4th, less than a week away. It’s kind of hard to believe. It’s been such a long time coming, yet it still has managed to sneak up on me, as it were. The music part is the first MTX album in twelve years. Pulling that together just on its own took some doing, I can tell you.

But it’s also the realization of a plan that goes all the way back to 2005, when the band had ceased to function along with the entire under- and over-ground music industry, and I started writing what would become the unexpectedly successful novel, King Dork. When Tom Henderson, the book’s narrator, began to write songs in the narrative, it was perhaps inevitable that I’d try to write some of them for real alongside their fictional counterparts in the book. And that’s exactly what happened. I half-finished the novel with a handful of half-written songs.

From there I developed a kind of fantasy vision of my future as a novelist, not unlike the fantasy careers of Tom’s imaginary notebook rock bands. (Just call me Tennis with Guitars.) In this fantasy vision, the book I was typing at Cato’s Ale House would become a smash success, and I would use this success and my new position as a Literary Big Name to organize the recording and release of a parallel album of songs from the book, bringing my band back from the dead. The two things would function as complementary iterations or… “faces”, maybe, of the same grand project, the same story. Fans of the songs could learn more about them by exploring the novel that gave rise to them, while my legions of readers could deepen the literary experience by hearing the fictional songs “made flesh.” (And maybe dancing around the room in their underwear, because they’re nerds and they probably need to get out more. i.e., Literature, the way it was obviously meant to be.) I imagined a massive rock and roll book tour, sixty cities plus, with library and bookstore visits in the day, rock and roll shows in the evenings, readings on the stage at the Fillmore, surprise punk rock pop up shows at the Millbrae Library or Powell’s. Hollywood, New York, Stockholm, the whole deal. Media and merch tie-ins as far as the eye could see: basically, James Joyce meets Gene Simmons, meets Don Kirshner, meets Ron Popeil.

In my fantasy I had re-invented the novel as a trans-media “experience”, the Great American Young Adult Novel with Guitar; and I had reinvented the rock album as a virtual LP with a whole novel inside the imaginary gate-fold cover instead of mere liner notes by some guy from Rolling Stone. Books, records, and shows would never be the same. I was really something. Soon everyone would be doing it, I was sure.

You guys all do that kind of thing, too, the semi-ironic grand fantasy that only sets you up for a more profound anti-climax when actual events play out. I mean, don’t you?

But the craziest part is that a bit of it did in actual fact come true, sort of. I mean, King Dork was an undeniable critical, media, and commercial success. It made a genuine impact on popular culture, the real popular culture, not just the imaginary one in my head. The other half of the fantasy, though, proved much more difficult to pull together, so difficult that I all but gave up on even the fantasy, let alone actually trying to do it. Though bits of the unfinished songs did trickle out in various forms, such as half-assed acoustic versions of some of them as bonus tracks on the audio book, and performances in empty Barnes & Noble stores across the country, the full album never materialized. Nor did the radical reconstitution of the music and publishing industries, and of Art itself. Boy, did that ever not materialize.

Well, how could it? Who would pay for it? Who would buy it? Who would care about it all? Surprisingly, having a successful novel doesn’t mean you automatically have a whole bunch of guys in suits banging on your door saying “here’s some money to record an album to go along with your book, plus a detailed plan on how to make that happen.” Plus, rousing the beast and getting it moving at all was always a pretty big, unlikely undertaking in itself. And by beast, I mean the Mr. T Experience.

But somehow, ten years later, a version of it has materialized. It may be just a bit smaller than the grandiose fantasy outlined above, but that it happened at all is pretty amazing. I’m lucky to have had so much help making it happen, from my bandmates most of all, but from dozens of others as well. It turns out you don’t need the guys in the suits. Help and goodwill from the community of people who have liked your songs and books for years and years can help you do it on your own, or a version of it anyway. And if it doesn’t quite turn the whole world inside out as it did in the fantasy, at minimum we all get a new MTX album out of the deal, something I was also pretty sure would never happen.

So, I thank you.

Now, because there’s still confusion (always with the confusion, people) here’s how it’s going to work.

The release date for the paperback edition of King Dork Approximately the Novel is October 4th, 2016. It costs $9.99. When you get your hands on the book (preferably by buying it) you’ll find the url of a download page and a code to enter. Enter it, and a zip file of King Dork Approximately the Album will download to your hard drive. If you buy the book from the Sounds Radical website, you can download the album, just as you might if you bought it from iTunes or the like, and listen to it while you wait for the physical book to arrive in the mail. There are two singles that we are releasing to the “services,” “Cinthya (with a Y)” and “High School Is the Penalty for Transgressions Yet to Be Specified.” You can buy these on iTunes, Amazon, Google Play, etc. Up till January, though, the only way to get the rest of the album is through the book download procedure outlined above. This record is really, really tied to the book and I’m not gonna let you forget it if I can help it, at least not while we’re on tour and have a merch table.

In January, there will be a general digital release, meaning the whole album will be up on iTunes, spotify, etc. For those who feel it is worth waiting a few few months for the opportunity to pay the same price for the sound files without the book, January is your moment.

In April, the vinyl version of the album will be released by Sounds Rad, augmented with extra tracks and other cool peripheral stuff.

My hope is that by April this will have laid the groundwork for a subsequent (non book) MTX album as well as subsequent King Dork books. (The grand fantasy there is: six more books, with guitar, ending with King Dork Superstar, in which Tom is 42 years old. I’ve still got that fantasizing streak, you see.) But that’s a discussion for another time. Help make this work, and maybe the subsequent stuff can have a chance of working, too. And the way to help is, buy, read, and listen. Thanks, and cheers to you all.

Almost Human continues its strong premiere season with its fourth installment, “The Bends.” The titular item is a new drug made from seaweed (and causes a weird green-y algae growth on its overdose victims) that would be wildly popular if it could be processed with a high enough level of purity (shades of Breaking Bad here, without the, you know, cancer and stuff).

Rudy Lom (Mackenzie Crook) goes undercover in this week's Almost Human episode, "The Bends." Courtesy of Fox.
Rudy Lom (Mackenzie Crook) goes undercover in this week’s Almost Human episode, “The Bends.”
Courtesy of Fox.

Lom, Rudy Lom

The episode starts with our intrepid lab geek, Rudy Lom, in some sort of about-to-get-violent situation. It seems as if Rudy is undercover and his cover his blown—he releases a steam vent (handy how those are always around, just at elbow height, in these situations) and runs. His pursuers shoot, one getting him in the arm.

We then get the ’24 Hours Earlier’ super-title (we understand the use of the flash-forward, and it wasn’t done badly here, but it seems to be getting a tad overused in television these days. Just our personal opinion.) and go to Kennex and Dorian, eating lunch (dinner?) at a sushi place. Well, Kennex is eating, Dorian is clearly in a hurry to get someplace (where is never established). After declaring he can’t leave until he has eaten everything on his plate, per Japanese culture, Dorian has the chef serve Kennex some sort of clear-ish, wriggling, still very much alive slug thing (having lived in Japan for two years, we can clearly state that that is NOT something usually served in a Japanese restaurant). Tricked by his own words, Kennex eats it.

Ah, male bonding.

Cut to someone we’ve never seen before, with a nifty phone-in-palm device (why doesn’t EVERYONE have these?? Is it new tech? Is it super expensive? He’s the only one we’ve seen with this!) talking to his wife, who clearly doesn’t know he’s in a obviously-where-crimes-happen alley. After lying through his teeth about where he is, Frank Cooper—we find out that’s his name—meets up clearly-not-good-guys. We quickly discover that he’s there to introduce a new cook to THE drug pin of this city, The Bishop. Apparently there’s 600 liters of raw product just waiting for the next Walter White (sorry, we got our shows mixed for a second); the next cook-extraordinaire to brew up the drug.

But things go wrong when the Bishop finds a subcutaneous wire (another piece of cool tech) on Cooper, and bam, bam, both Cooper and his cook buddy are dead.

We didn't have a picture of the newly deceased friend, but here's Kennex, looking resolved and sad that his friend is dead. Courtesy of Fox.
We didn’t have a picture of the newly deceased friend, but here’s Kennex, looking resolved and sad that his friend is dead.
Courtesy of Fox.

Because All Dirty Cops Keep Incriminating Evidence In Their Trunks, Uh-Doy

The next morning, Kennex and Dorian are called to the crime scene—a dead cop (clearly Cooper), whose car’s trunk his full of illegal drugs, clearly making Cooper out to be a dead, dirty cop. But wait, no, Kennex was buddies with Cooper (of course he was!) and he knows in his gut Cooper wasn’t dirty. Also, Kennex points out, if Cooper was dirty, why wear a wire?

Of course, all those drugs in the trunk  and multiple dead bodies at what is clearly a drug deal gone wrong is enough for Detective Paul (whose sole purpose so far is to be the one guy who doesn’t like Kennex…), who declares Cooper guilty and then pretty much disappears for the next fifteen minutes of air time.

Oh, we also get some new info on the drug, the Bends. It’s highly toxic, and the Bishop is poised to take over the streets with it (a la The Wire; again, we’re not saying this show is breaking new ground, only that its execution is a lot of fun to watch). This is mostly info-dumped by Detective Stahl (Minka Kelly), who seems to be regulated to that quite a bit. Not that she doesn’t do it well, but we wish we’d see a few more women doing some kicking-ass and taking names.

This is Stahl's "I am going to read out loud what the computer is telling me because I have one job in this precinct and I'm going to do it" face.
This is Stahl’s “I am going to read out loud what the computer is telling me because I have one job in this precinct and I’m going to do it” face.

The Case of the Dirty-Or-Just-Mildly-Dusty Cop

Kennex meets with the widow (was it just us or was there some ‘my-best-friend’s-wife-is-the-woman-I-loved subtext going on with Kennex? We never do find out why he and Cooper aren’t friends anymore…). Of course the widow proclaims her husband’s innocence.

Maldonado meets with Captain Barros, Cooper’s commanding officer, who doesn’t want to believe Cooper was dirty either, but admits that Cooper wasn’t assigned to any official undercover work; Barros does say that Cooper was the type of cop to work something on his own. Nonwithstanding, since Cooper’s financials show suspicious activities, Maldonado is going to have to investigate.

The widow tells Kennex that Cooper went up to their cabin the day he died, so that’s where Kennex and Dorian head. It’s already been torn apart, but thanks to the helpful clue from the widow that Cooper was working on the fireplace, Kennex finds the receiver for Cooper’s wire. Unfortunately it doesn’t prove anything in terms of Cooper’s innocence but it does prove that The Bishop was there, which apparently is a big deal since no one knows what Bishop looks like.

Cue the ‘let’s find a new cook and go undercover and get Bishop plan.’ Except they need a cook…and that’s when they bring in Rudy. Who apparently is a bio-tech, cybernetic, computer programming…chemist. Don’t think on that one too much. A geek is a geek, right? Clearly we all have expert levels of knowledge in all fields related to geekdom. There’s probably a Venn diagram somewhere.

Rudy jumps at the chance to go undercover (a great subtle touch, when Kennex is pitching the idea to Rudy, is when Rudy sees his reflection in a tux, a la James Bond, in the metal surface of his instruments). He even has a fedora ready and waiting.

Rudy Lom (again, sorry). But come on, he is rocking that fedora. Courtesy of Fox.
Rudy Lom (again, sorry). But come on, he is rocking that fedora.
Courtesy of Fox.

Time for the “Live Your Cover” Speech

While Detective Paul (who is apparently the undercover expert) drills Rudy, Kennex and Dorian go find a bad guy that can set up a meet with The Bishop.

They find someone relatively easily (Patrick Gallagher of Glee), who agrees to set up the meet after a little kind-of-sort-of blackmail from Kennex.

Rudy holds up under Det. Paul’s grilling, though the fedora gets nixed (though we liked it, Mackenzie Crook can rock a fedora) and the operation is a go—except for one thing. Rudy drinks a nasty liquid (which makes him fart, ha ha bathroom humor) but also turns his whole body into a GPS-locater. It’s in beta, he says, and it’s top-secret.

So, off Rudy goes to his meet, followed by two cockroach-cameras (a lovely bit of tech), where he meets the Bishop and almost blows the whole thing; Dorian has to go in to provide support (but the cover is still intact). Bad guys convinced of Rudy’s nefarious-ness, they agree to take him to the ‘real lab’–but first he has to drink some gross-milky looking liquid—and when he does, his GPS signal cuts off.

The bad guys then take Rudy to the ‘real lab’ after revealing that guy we think is the The Bishop isn’t, in fact, The Bishop. It’s a solid reveal that played out well.

Dorian and the bad guys robot (with head, at this point). Courtesy of Fox.
Dorian and the bad guys robot (with head, at this point).
Courtesy of Fox.

You Dirty Double Crossing Double-Crosser!

Back at the base, Kennex rolls out as soon as Rudy’s signal disappears—but even though no one exited the building, Rudy’s is nowhere to be found; because bad guys, apparently, use sewers. The bad guys and Not-Bishop bring Rudy to a lab and demand he cooks—and he does, creating a product that’s 94% pure.

Meanwhile, back with Kennex, they figure out that the only way the bad guys could have known to have Rudy drink the GPS-signal block juice was if one of the bad guys was a cop. Maldonado puts two and two together, and figures out that Barros is The Bishop.

Sure enough, Rudy (now in a super-secret lab) meets Barros, who asks Rudy how he cooked such a pure form of the drug.

Maldonado called Barros to ‘update’ him, and manages to track the phone to get a location. Kennex and Dorian speed to him.

While Rudy explains how the cooking process is more of an art than a science, the goons are alerted to something-not-right and now we’re back to where we were at the beginning of the episode. Rudy escapes, gets shot in the arm—

And Kennex and Dorian get there. Two henchman are instantly disposed of, then Kennex goes after Barros while Dorian goes at it with Barros’ android, which was a great fight that ends with the bad robot’s (see what we did there?) head getting ripped off his body, spine still attached. Awesome.

Kennex, Lom and Dorian safe and sound after their adventures. Courtesy of Fox.
Kennex, Lom and Dorian safe and sound after their adventures.
Courtesy of Fox.

All Wells That Ends Up at a Cop Bar

Kennex gets Barros, clears Cooper’s name, and he, Dorian and Rudy go out to celebrate—to Kennex’s cop bar, much to his dismay.

Another really good episode. Seriously, if you’re not watching this, you should be. The ratings aren’t great (though the numbers went up this week) and Fox isn’t known for its generosity with freshman shows and middle-ish ratings. So watch it! Tell your friends to watch it! While not perfect (Dorian is supposed to be ‘troubled’ but he seems the saner of the two, for example) it’s still better than most of what’s on TV, and certainly the world and its characters are intriguing enough—and the episodes are doing an excellent job expanding and building the world—that this show could be one with a lot of mileage in it.

Almost Human airs on Fox on Mondays at 8 p.m.

You can catch up on all the episodes so far on Hulu or Fox.com.

Almost Human is rapidly becoming our favorite new show of the 2013 season. Is it groundbreaking? Not really—but what it does it does well, including playing on tropes and concepts that are familiar without making them seem cliché or—worse—lazy.

With episode three, “Are You Receiving?” we get a standard hostage situation (the show continues it’s good-hearted, um, emulation of themes and motifs by pretty much recreating Die Hard in 2048) but the this show is not so much about the what is happening as it is about who it’s happening too, and Karl Urban and Michael Ealy—not to mention the show’s robust ensemble cast which includes veterans Lili Taylor and Mackenzie Crook (Pirates of the Caribbean)—have an endearing chemistry and are well on their way to forging a great TV partnership.

They Give Great Car Conversation

Almost Human's futuristic cityscape. Courtesy of Fox.
Almost Human’s futuristic cityscape. Courtesy of Fox.

The episode starts with Kennex (Urban) going about his morning ablations—including the addition of rubbing some olive oil on his prosthetic leg (a nice nod to episode two), which does, as Dorian (Ealy) had promised, stop the squeaking.

Urban is really captivating as Kennex, giving the gruff-cop-everyman-with-a-heart-of-gold his own personal touch, and he and Ealy have already settled into an appealing back and forth dialogue that feels organic and natural; well written repartee and the chemistry of the two leads lend this show a great deal of its charm.

We go to a large, modern-y business building where a security guard brings a package up to the 25th floor. He flirts with one of the girls—there’s business about a keyed lock versus a bio lock that we thought was going to pay off later but doesn’t—and then he goes back to his desk in the lobby, where he is, sadly, shot by the bad guys. The bad guys then shoot a janitor (bad day to be a minimum wage employee at whatever building this is) and plant a bomb-looking device in the basement. Apparently Fox isn’t too concerned about that whole 8 p.m. time slot, because blood sprayed and everything.

We also learn that the bad guy likes to ask people what their name is before he kills them. You know, because without our manners where would we be?

Back to Kennex, who is being mildly lectured by Dorian about his tardiness in picking up Dorian.

Sidenote: So, apparently, Dorian has an apartment of his own somewhere not in the Police precinct. Which is fine, we just assumed he would just go back to the…lab/basement place or whatever and, you know, hibernate for the night. If he does have an apartment, that was fast. Or maybe there’s a like a robo-hostel for all the cybernetic cops? Now that’s an idea for show!

The two partners engage in some mild ribbing about the use of olive oil and coffee temperature—entertaining, as both actors have solid comedic timing and there is a sense that they genuinely like each other—when a call comes in about a gunshot victim at—you guessed it—our super classy office building.

Kennex (Karl Urban) and Dorian (Michael Ealy) arrive at the scene of the crime Courtesy of Fox.
Kennex (Karl Urban) and Dorian (Michael Ealy) arrive at the scene of the crime
Courtesy of Fox.

They Just Walked Right In and Shot Him

Kennex and Dorian get to the building and Dorian is able to pull a sketchy image of our bad guys going up to the 25th floor from the shattered security system—which means they’re still in the building. As the bad guys have disabled the elevators, Kennex and Dorian start up the stairs.

The bad guys, meanwhile, have rounded up the employees on the 25th floor—including a young-ish girl who was huddled under a desk. Main Bad Guy (Damon Herriman) has a mildly existential monologue about the importance of honesty before hauling her out with the rest of the hostages and telling Bald Henchman to “start now,” resulting in the triggering of the bomb they had set earlier. Kennex and Dorian run out to see a gaping hole where the lobby used to be.

So there’s nothing like an explosion in the business district to get the attention of law enforcement; while Kennex and Dorian still heading up, Stahl (Minka Kelly) and Maldonado (Lili Taylor) connect in through some weird open-air speaker phone that oddly knows when to turn the mute on and off.

Maldonado tells Kennex to not ascend and to stay and assist with the evacuation, leading Kennex to the old fake-static-to-drop-call trick, which leads to one of our top three lines of the night:

Dorian: Did you just hang up on Captain Maldonado?

Kennex: It was a boring conversation, anyway.

Ha. Funny. Well-delivered, both self-aware and situationally appropriate. And an excellent encapsulation in two lines of what makes this show work: yes, it is unashamedly stealing, but it knows it, and you know it, and it’s done well, with just enough tongue-in-check self-awareness mixed with a kind of geeked-out respect.

The guys keep going up, and Maldonado, on the advice of Kennex, jams all communication signals—including Kennex and Ealy’s phones/wifi/whatever it is, leading the Main Bad Guy to pronounce how predictable the police are.

Sidenote: this is where, we admit, we clued into the it’s-not-really-about-the-hostage-it’s-about-the-money ‘twist,’ mostly because that’s almost exactly what both the Die Hard 1 and 3 baddies say at roughly the same point in those movies. So.

Capt. Maldonado (Lili Taylor) talks to her officers via super smart speaker phone. Courtesy of Fox.
Capt. Maldonado (Lili Taylor) talks to her officers via super smart speaker phone. Courtesy of Fox.

Don’t Overthink the Phone Thing

With all of the phone calls not being able to get out, Dorian ends up getting any calls placed in the building bounced to him. After a amusing interchange with a Portuguese woman (where Dorian speaks flawless Portuguese as a woman), they get a call from a women trapped with the gunman (Dorian, answering the call as Kennex, adds a nice bit of humor just as the show get serious).

The caller—Paige—is hiding in a closet with a view of the hostage situation. As she’s talking to Kennex, the bad guys grab a random hostage—Lou–and execute him, throwing his body out of the window, where it lands feet from the mobile police command center. Turning him over, Detective Paul (Michael Irby), he of the I-don’t-like-you-Kennex attitude of last week, finds a note attached to the front of the body demanding: “No Cops, Stay Out.”

Maldonado initiates hostage protocol. And sends a drone with a phone (which somehow works? Why didn’t Kennex have a phone like that??) and gets Lead Bad Guy’s demands (airlift for escape and a fission igniter).

Using facial recognition, Maldonado identifies Lead Bad Guy as Lucas Vincent, a lieutenant in the Holy Reclamation Army (never a good combination of words).

Lucas gives Maldonado a 43 minute deadline or a hostage dies.

Kennex (another top three line) asks Dorian if a fission igniter is as bad as he thinks it is…and it is. It’s a detonator for a mega-ton explosive device (though why they would have a mega ton explosive and not the detonator, we don’t know).

Paige, meanwhile, is pretty close to breaking down. We find out the young-ish girl hiding under the desk earlier is Jenna, her sister, and that Jenna was only there to have lunch with Paige.

Kennex, trying to calm Paige down, tells a story of a near-death experience he had with his father when they were ice-fishing. It works mostly because Urban excels at that gravelly, hero-of-the-day tone. With Paige calmer, and having gleaned some crucial information from her, Kennex and Dorian continue up the stairs.

It's just this guy I shot. No biggie. Courtesy of FOx.
It’s just this guy I shot. No biggie.
Courtesy of FOx.

Just The Igniter, Ma’am

Back at police headquarters, Maldonado can’t get a fission igniter (apparently approval for that is a much higher paygrade), so Rudy Lom (Mackenzie Crook) offers to make a fake one that could pass an initial scan. Maldonado approves it.

Stahl decants a load of exposition; Holy Reclamation Army is an anti-Western religious group known for taking hostages in order to further their political gains, with no qualms at taking life.

Back with Kennex and Dorian, their leisurely trip up the stairs is interrupted with gunfire—two bad guys have spotted them up above. The firefight moves into a deserted office floor, where Dorian takes out one bad guy and the other one, injured, flees.

Kennex comes up to Dorian and discovers Dorian has been injured—a glancing blow to the head. Dorian, who is glitching a little, still manages to discover that their bad guy—originally id’d as Michael Demerais—has a facemaker (it does what it sounds like)—and once disabled, the bad guy is revealed to be Gregor Stone, not a member of the Holy Reclamation Army, just a petty criminal.

He also finds a small red plastic disc with the word “start” on it; but then it becomes obvious that the gunshot has injured Dorian more than he let on—he won’t be able to walk within five minutes.

Dorian wonders why the gang is going through the trouble of faking identities instead of just wearing masks while Kennex has to try to repair Dorian using an old q-tip (ew) and lying through his teeth about the cleanliness of his tools, leading to our third top three lines of the night, Kennex in regards to the bundle of wires/tendons revealed in Dorian’s injury and being unable to find the “magenta one,” tells Dorian “there’s 50 shades of purple in there.” Ha. In fact the whole trying-to-fix-Dorian-scene was classic.

Back at the precinct, Lom is trying to finish the fission igniter while a newer robot watches. He only has four minutes…

Kennex, who has accidently knock Dorian unconscious, talks to Paige in another effort to calm her down. While connecting wires with (used) chewing gum, we learn Kennex’s middle name is Reginald (his father was an Elton John fan, apparently).

ALMOST HUMAN:  Det. John Kennex (Karl Urban, R) assists Dorian (Michael Ealy, L). Cr: Liane Hentscher/FOX
ALMOST HUMAN: Det. John Kennex (Karl Urban, R) assists Dorian (Michael Ealy, L).
Cr: Liane Hentscher/FOX

Phone’s Haven’t Gotten Any Smaller, but the Guns Got Huge

The injured bad guy makes it up the 25th floor to tell Lucas there’s two guys in the building. Lucas tries to bluff with Maldonado to see if they’re cops but she (nicely) calls his bluff and he ends up not knowing—but he still sends three guys to the stairwells with really big guns.

Paige decides she can’t hide out in the closet while her sister is one of the hostages, so she sneaks out when the Bald Henchman’s back was turned and joins the hostages (against Kennex’s advice). She keeps her head though, and manages to plant her phone (with its open line) so that Kennex can hear what happens in the room. She does tell Kennex before she gets off the phone that the bad guys keep going to the window in the corner for some reason.

Lom, the unsung hero of the day, gets the igniter finished and Det. Paul sends it up. Kennex and Dorian, knowing the stairs aren’t safe, are stymied on how to get to the 25th floor.

Lucas gets the igniter and tells Bald Henchman to send ‘the message to the other crew.’  He also says they won’t be taking the igniter—leading Dorian to realize the hostage situation is a decoy.

Kennex and Dorian figure out that the other crew is outside the building, and the red discs are being used as a reflective/point-to-point communication—and the only thing of value nearby is the palladium depot. Where the other crew is, stealing lots and lots of palladium.

Kennex than gets to say “it’s a heist,” a la John McClane in, well, all the Die Hards. Points to Urban for saying it believably and without any McClane mannerisms.

He totally doesn't look anything like John McClane, though.
He totally doesn’t look anything like John McClane, though.

So, It’s Kind of Like Die Hard. Only with Robots.

The bad guys plant a bomb with the hostages (a light bomb), and Kennex realizes the bad guys are going to kill all the hostages. There’s no way for Kennex to get up the floor in time, but Dorian can—by climbing up the elevator cables. They know it’s a suicide mission, but there’s no other option. Dorian goes up the elevator shaft before Kennex can stop him.

Dorian then gets to be pretty bad ass, punching through the air ducts (ah, where would we would be without air ducts??) and taking out four bad guys before Lucas takes Dorian down.

Lucas goes through his ‘what’s your name?’ spiel and, then, just before Lucas can pull the trigger, Kennex—wearing the Facemaker disguising him as one of the gang—comes in and finishes off the rest of the baddies. He grabs the negotiating phone and tells Maldonado to drop the comm jam—the other bad guys were using it to jam the alarm at the palladium depot.

They do so, and the alarm goes off, trapping crew 2 in the vault.

Dorian disables the light bomb, and yay, day saved.

Paige and Jenna meet Kennex face to face and mutual admiration ensues.

"There's like 50 shades of purple in there, man!" Courtesy of Fox.
“There’s like 50 shades of purple in there, man!”
Courtesy of Fox.

He’s not Injured, He’s My Partner

Dorian and Kennex go back to the station, where they are greeted with applause—a far cry from the last week’s sullen muttering—and Kennex, having completed the I-don’t-like-my-partner phase and firmly moving into the he’s-weird-but-he’s-mine odd couple phase, bypasses Lom’s lecture about fixing Dorian with chewing gum and takes Dorian out for noodles. Aw. They’re buddies now!

On the way to the noodle shop, Dorian admits that when the gun was pointed at his head, he discovered he did not want to die.

That’s intriguing. It’s hard to write a world with robots or any type of AI and not have to grapple with the sentient beings versus human technology moral dilemma, and the writers seem to laying the groundwork for this.

The episode ends with Dorian singing (reasonable well) along with Benny and the Jets. And calling Kennex ‘Reginald.’

All in all, a really good episode. Like all great TV, the experience was more than just a sum up of what happened.

Come back next week for more on our favorite odd couple!

Almost Human airs on Fox on Mondays at 8 p.m.

Warner Bros. has released a huge new banner for Guillermo Del Toro’s Pacific Rim featuring plenty of Jager versus Kaiju action. Seriously, this thing is massive. You can check out the full banner by clicking on it below.

PRM_SUPER_HORIZONTAL_WW_res

When legions of monstrous creatures, known as Kaiju, started rising from the sea, a war began that would take millions of lives and consume humanity’s resources for years on end. To combat the giant Kaiju, a special type of weapon was devised: massive robots, called Jaegers, which are controlled simultaneously by two pilots whose minds are locked in a neural bridge. But even the Jaegers are proving nearly defenseless in the face of the relentless Kaiju. On the verge of defeat, the forces defending mankind have no choice but to turn to two unlikely heroes – a washed up former pilot (Charlie Hunnam) and an untested trainee (Rinko Kikuchi) – who are teamed to drive a legendary but seemingly obsolete Jaeger from the past. Together, they stand as mankind’s last hope against the mounting apocalypse.

Pacific Rim hits theaters July 12, 2013.

The first official trailer for Guillermo Del Toro’s upcoming monsters versus robots sci-fi film Pacific Rim has been released online. If you weren’t already excited for this movie, this trailer definitely will do the trick. Come on, monsters versus robots!

When legions of monstrous creatures, known as Kaiju, started rising from the sea, a war began that would take millions of lives and consume humanity’s resources for years on end. To combat the giant Kaiju, a special type of weapon was devised: massive robots, called Jaegers, which are controlled simultaneously by two pilots whose minds are locked in a neural bridge. But even the Jaegers are proving nearly defenseless in the face of the relentless Kaiju. On the verge of defeat, the forces defending mankind have no choice but to turn to two unlikely heroes—a washed up former pilot (Charlie Hunnam) and an untested trainee (Rinko Kikuchi)—who are teamed to drive a legendary but seemingly obsolete Jaeger from the past. Together, they stand as mankind’s last hope against the mounting apocalypse.

Pacific Rim hits theaters July 12, 2013.

Next January we will see a crossover event been Topps and IDW where we will see Mars Attacks take on…well, everyone in a series of one-shots. Spread out over the course of five weeks in January, we will see a series of one-shots with the zany aliens taking on the entire IDW universe.

The series will feature regular covers by Ray Dillon in a style inspired by the classic trading cards, but they’ll also come with some surprising variants allowing Mars to attack a mix of well known creator-owned properties by artists like Mike Allred, =John Byrne, Walt Simonson, Rob Guillory, Dave Sim and Terry Moore nas well as some property variants like Judge Dredd by Ray Dillon.

The brains behind the crossover event, IDW Editor-in-Chief and Chief Creative Officer Chris Ryall, had this to say about the upcoming crossover:

“The ‘Mars Attacks’ property is a bit more insane than most of the licenses we have. There’s lots of good carnage in there, so we thought it’d be fun if we could spin that into some of our other books that are more respectful properties. Normally in ‘Transformers’ you don’t get the level of insanity of a ‘Mars Attacks’ comic. We thought it’d be fun to mash that all together.

I wanted ‘Mars Attacks’ to fit into these universes by the rules already established in these books. So if there’s a Popeye story, the Martians can only cause as much damage as you’d see in an old Popeye strip or a Fleischer cartoon. It’s not going to be quite as over-the-top violent as John Layman’s ‘Mars Attacks’ comic. It’ll fit well into the Popeye universe. So every issue is a stand-alone story, and they roll out chronologically by era. Popeye comes first and takes place further back in the timeline around the 1930s.”

Source: CBR

Not often do we get a bump up in a release date for video games. Coming a week earlier than previously announced by Activision, Transformers: Fall of Cybertron is now releasing August 21st in the U.S. and the 24th for Europe.

To celebrate the good news, I present METROPLEX!

Is it a robot, an android, a cyborg, a mechanoid? Heidi and Stephen get to the bottom of this question while also discussing their favorite mechanoids from pop culture and their feelings on the impending Robo-Apocalypse.

Creepy humanoid robots:

http://www.geminoid.jp/en/mission.html
http://mashable.com/2011/03/04/lifelike-robot/
http://mforum.cari.com.my/viewthread.php?tid=635499

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