Briefly: We’re finally just a few days away from the anticipated (and already hated for some reason) release of Josh Trank’s Fantastic Four reboot, and the hilarious team over at Screen Junkies has just released a hilarious Honest Trailer take on 2005’s Fantastic Four and 2007’s Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer.

Yep, those movies were pretty, pretty terrible. There are a ton of moments shown off over the course of this Honest Trailer that I’d long since forgotten, and now I just can’t stop thinking about them.

My favourite part? When it’s mentioned that everyone totally freaked out over a black Johnny Storm, but that a Latina Sue Storm was more than okay.

So, what do you think? Are you looking forward to the Fantastic Four reboot? Would you rather see the rights revert to Marvel? Sound out below!

Sin City: A Dame to Kill For, is the sequel to the gritty, perverse, irreverent and occasionally funny Sin City, created by the iconic graphic novelist Frank Miller (300, The Spirit) and directed by Robert Rodriguez. Both movies live in the black-and-white, highly stylized, extremely violent oeuvre both Miller and Rodriguez are known for, but unlike it’s predecessor, Sin City: A Dame to Kill For is all about the style, with no room for story or substance.

Bruce Willis and Jessica Alba in Sin City: A Dame to Kill For
Bruce Willis and Jessica Alba in Sin City: A Dame to Kill For

Senator Rourke (Powers Boothe) returns as the ultimate bad-guy, but the role, which was the underpinning to the Hartigan (Bruce Willis)/Nancy (Jessica Alba) story that drove the first movie, is two-dimensional here. He is a bad guy because he is a bad guy–all sense that the power he holds has perverted his greatest strengths to his most horrible vices is gone. It is especially clear in his interactions with Johnny (Joseph Gordon-Levitt), a story which seems to exist in the movie solely to show that (a) Gordon-Levitt looks very good in a tight suit and a smirk, and (b) that Rourke is a terrible person. Which we already knew.

A Dame To Kill For suffers from these issues through out. The main story–about Dwight (Josh Brolin here, Clive Owen in Sin City), and his one-true-love/femme fatale Ava Lord (Eva Green, playing the cat eyed, sullen, secretive part we’ve seen her do before, only this time with a LOT more nudity–seriously, we now know more about Green’s body then we ever really wanted to)–feels forced and falls flat of the deep, haunting, resonating love story between the doomed Hartigan and Nancy we saw in the first movie.

Josh Brolin and Eva Green as Dwight and Ava in Sin City: A Dame to Kill For
Josh Brolin and Eva Green as Dwight and Ava in Sin City: A Dame to Kill For

The subtle and clever interweaving of individual story and plot that made Sin City more than just a comic-book movie, and vaulted it into cult-status, is missing completely here. While there are multiple viewpoints and stories being told, including an intro by Marv (Mickey Rourke, unrecognizable in Elephant-man style make-up), each story stands by itself, touching against the others only by chance at Kadie’s Bar, where Alba’s Nancy performs a series of increasingly embarrassing strip-teases. Nancy is watched over by Marv (for some unknown reason), except when he is manipulated by one of the other characters to go off and get involved in murder and mayhem. This lack of coherence and depth, despite the solid performances by the entire cast, makes A Dame To Kill For merely all right–occasionally funny, and sometimes cringe-inducing, but never riveting.

The largely black-and-white film uses sharp, evocative jabs of color (red blood, green eyes, a sudden flash of strawberry blonde hair) as not-subtle-at-all indicators of characterization or an attempt-at-wry commentary (Ava’s eyes go green when her true character is revealed). Characters leap out of the black-and-white world of Miller’s Sin City, capturing the essence of the visual work extraordinarily well. We saw it 3D, which added nothing except a vague headache caused by the glasses.

Overall, the film is visually stunning, well acted, but unable to drive its story across numerous characters and plot lines.

Sin City: A Dame to Kill For is open at a theatre near you.

What do you think? Seen it? Won’t see it? Can’t hardly wait to see it? Watch the trailer below and let us know in the comments!

Geekscape Rates: 2.5/5 Stars

Just when you thought Robert Rodriguez couldn’t add anymore females to his cast. Oh wait, it’s a Robert Rodriguez movie. Hudgens will join Sofia Vergara, Alexa Vega, Amber Heard, Jessica Alba, Lady Gaga and Michelle Rodriguez. There are some male actors in the movie too. I think.

Here’s the official announcement from her blog:

Yes, it is true! We can confirm that Vanessa will be in the new Robert Rodiguez movie

Machete Kills as Cereza! Check out the clip above!

We can’t wait to see Vanessa! Are you excited?

Well, I can’t say that I am excited for her as much as the others. But anyway…here’s a synopsis for the movie!

The second film in the Machete trilogy finds Machete mourning the loss of his beloved Sartana, slain during a run in with the cartels. Machete is recruited by the President of the United States for a mission which would be impossible for any mortal man. Machete must battle his way through Mexico to take down a cartel leader, Mendez the Madman, who threatens to fire a missile on the US. Machete foils Mendez’s plot only to find that the missiles are remote wired to and triggered by the madman’s still beating heart. The only man who can disarm the missile is eccentric billionaire arms dealer, Luther Voz, who has hatched a plan of his own to spread war across the planet with a weapon in space. Machete takes on Voz and his army in order to dismantle his master plan for global anarchy

No release date has been set yet. However expect about ten more announcements of hot females joining the cast. No, I’m just kidding. Well….maybe.

Alexa Vega is best known as Carmen Cortez in Robert Rodriguez’s Spy Kids films. Well now she’s all grown up and has just landed herself a role in Rodriguez’s Machete Kills. She’ll be playing the role of KillJoy, a character which I can only assume to be a “sexy” killer. Why do I assume that you ask? That would be because Vega posted a picture of herself in costume on her Instagram page. Check it out below…

In Machete Kills, The U.S. government recruits Machete (Danny Trejo) to battle his way through Mexico in order to take down an arms dealer (Mel Gibson) who looks to launch a weapon into space.

Alexa Vega then…
Alexa Vega now as Killjoy!

Machete Kills is being directed by Robert Rodriguez and stars Danny Trejo, Jessica Alba, Michelle Rodriguez, Sofia Vergara, Amber Heard, Mel Gibson and Charlie Sheen. Machete Kills his way into theaters in 2013.

Source: Superherohype

Machete Kills is currently in production and news is pouring in.  Yesterday, Robert Rodriguez tweeted this:

It’s the POTUS who recruits Machete to battle his way through Mexico to take down an arms dealer, played by Mel Gibson, who wants to launch a weapon into space.

Set pics from Machete Kills have also been showing up on Twitter, courtesy of Jessica Alba:

Machete Kills is being directed by Robert Rodriguez and stars Danny Trejo, Jessica Alba, Michelle Rodriguez, Sofia Vergara, Amber Heard, Mel Gibson and Charlie Sheen. Machete Kills his way into theaters in 2013.

 

Deadline reports that Dimension Films announced the release date for the long awaited (if not marginally forgotten) sequel to 2005’s Sin City today. Frank Miller’s Sin City: A Dame To Kill For is now slated for Oct. 4, 2013 release. Like the first film, it will again be directed by Robert Rodriguez and Frank Miller, with William Monahan adding a hand to the script (which is also written by the pair).

Production is set to begin later this summer in Austin, Texas, at Rodriguez’s Troublemaker Studios. Sin City alum Mickey Rourke and Jessica Alba, who played Marv and Nancy Callahan in the original, are slated to return. Nothing is official yet with regards to the other cast members, but so far they are expected to return. No word on who will replace the late Brittany Murphy as Shellie (if anyone).