Tag: Equipment

Happy Fourth of July, Scapists. We never rest here at Teabag Prevention because neither does the enemy. We’ve decided that a lot of you probably don’t go outside for anything, even if your parents tell you to. You’re rebels like that. So we’ve been kind enough to make this second part of the Equipment Mini-Series explosion-based to commemorate our country’s independence, happiness, and affinity for exploding the other team.

 

THIS WEEK: THE TRIP MINE (85 Seconds it detonates if not already exploded)

Tip #1 – HAVE A NICE MINE!

The trip mine is the only Equipment item that directly kills opponents or vehicles. So take extreme advantage of this and also be very wary of its capabilites. When you hear a beeping and see an orange light, pay attention and be more attentive – you’ve got some ‘splodin to do. When playing in teams, always make sure to let your teammates know that it is around – otherwise you may get an accidental triple betrayal. There’s no achievement for that, no matter how cool it sounds.

 

 

Tip #2 I’LL TENDERIZE ‘IM!!!

When in a situation tighter than your sister’s jacket, the mine can take out enemy vehicles instantly. The vehicles might need a little tenderizing first, but once you lay that mine, a kill is in reach. Be sure to stay away from the vehicle, when doing this, because even though the blast should kill it and its passenger, you may also get caught up in that explosion.

TIP #3 DO IT AROUND PEOPLE

The Trip Mine can also be used to your best advantage in Flag/Bomb/or Big Team Battle games. Here’s how: plant your Trip Mine right at the base of your Flag or Bomb and make it so that an unsuspecting enemy goes for the victory Flag journey or for the Bomb arming and he ends up getting ‘sploded instead. That’s right. ‘Sploded

TIP #4 LISTEN ALL Y’ALL IT’S A SABOTAGE!

In Big Team Battle maps such as Valhalla you can sabotage the vehicles, or even items, using Trip Mines before anyone ever gets to them. You’re setting a booby trap. We said trap.

Here’s one: throw the Trip Mine under a vehicle so that the beeping and orange light are muffled and relatively unnoticeable. Once someone turns on the engine, it doesnt purr anymore. It will ‘splode

TIP #5 EXPLODE FROM WHEREST YOU CAME, MONSTER!

The simplest option with the Trip Mine is to lay the mine exactly where it is spawned. Anyone in a rush, at the beginning of a match, trying to go around the map picking up their favorite weapons before going out and Slaying might accidentally pick it up and do some ‘splodin. You’re really counting on someone’s stupidity here. Luckily, it won’t let you down.

TIP #6 BUBBLE TRAP
Combine the Trip Mine with a Bubble Shield. Here are two ways in which this can be effective:

1. When someone is in it just throw a mine during battle or while they are chasing you and it’ll explode with the full force of the Lord inside the Shield while you are perfectly unharmed. Just like in last week when we combined grenades and bubble shields.

2. Smarten up and in a congested battle situation, where most people will be running around like headless chickens and looking for safety from vehicles or crossfire, lay down your Trip Mine in a deployed Bubble Shield. Someone is bound to need the cover and accidentally step into their own private Michael Bay-level explosion. Warning: make sure you, or your teammates, don’t need the cover first.

TIP #7 NOT SO HARD TO KILL

 Now that you know exactly how gruesome, how dangerous, and how unbelievably risky laying down this important and amazing piece of equipment is you’re probably thinking “it’s too powerful…it’ll become sentient…it’ll destroy us all!” Well, don’t worry my Skynet fearing friend, you can destroy a trip mine by doing the following:

1. Shooting it a little bit.

2. Throwing a grenade at it.

3. Convincing a suicidal Spartan that it’s a good idea.

Note: You may also use these ways to kill (and therefore detonate) the Trip Mine to set traps from afar. When someone is near it and thinks they are safe, you may be on the other side of the map, waiting to shoot it and detonate their face. You may also use this trick with vehicles.

 

Things to Remember

1. Trip Mines take a very long time to detonate unless tripped – 85 seconds to be exact.

2. These things force you to be smart. Set traps, don’t throw them around yourself or you’ll seem more suicidal than Sean Kingston.

3. Make the Trip Mine’s disadvantages your advantages. Kind of like when you’re in a relationship.

 

Please tune in Next Week for the end of the Three-Part Equipment Mini-Series where we finish you off…er…give you tips on Grav Lifts and Power Drains. Same Bag time, Same Bag channel. Now go to your barbeque and tell girls that don’t care what you’ve learned today.

This week’s Teabag Prevention article was written by:

 

 

 

This week’s Teabag Prevention article, as always, was edited by:

 

 

For any comments, suggestions, or inquiries please email us at:

TeabagPrevention@gmail.com

And don’t forget to add us on myspace at:

www.myspace.com/teabag_prevention

 

In the months before Halo 3’s beta release, the mysterious “X button” fuction plagued the interwebs. Ridiculous rumors were spread far and wide. Once it was even believed that its function was to steal an oppenent’s weapon while it was attached to their back.

Then, we were told that this new function would change the way Halo is played. This left many wondering if a 3rd person camera view was open to a push of a button. After videos of leaked footage emerged, we soon found out what the answer was.

On May 16, 2007, Halo players were giddy to use this…

 

THIS WEEK – EQUIPMENT

BUBBLE SHIELD

Tip #1 APARTMENTS FROM THE FUTURE!…

Use the Bubble Shield as a means of getting closer to your opponents or to your most prized weapon. When you’re in an area that’s hot like mama’s freshly baked cookies and you want to get there, use the Bubble Shield as a ways to extend your safety. Toss it away from yourself and as far forward to your objective as possible. To do this, look up into the sky and toss it into the air. Once you’ve deployed it, and reached it safely, you will be nice and cozy in your new temporary home.

 

Tip #2 – …THEY ALSO COME WITH LIFE INSURANCE POLICIES!

When you’re low on shields and being chased by the man it is always a good idea to deploy a Bubble Shield to or near your destination, just like the above tip. The difference here is that once you see your opponent approaching you’re going to toss a grenade of any sort inside your own shield…

Jump out once your opponent is in in. You are now on the offense. The shield will explode, along with their face. You have now handed out some Exploding-flavored pain to them while you remain completely unharmed. Your next move is to then jump back into the fight and finish the yorb since they are now completely helpless – if they’re not already dead, that is.

Tip #3 – BITE OFF WHAT YOU CAN CHEW

Bubble shields do not stop road rage so DO NOT use them for protection against mobile objects themselves. DO use them against a vehicle’s weaponry. When under heavy fire from a vehicle you should toss a shield, while avoiding the vehicle of course, and either “stick em” or raid their vehicle. It is protection against the vehicle’s fire power, not the vehicle itself. Don’t just stand there, shoot the bitches.

And hope for the best…

 

Note: The Bubble Shield lasts for a total of 20 seconds.

REGENERATOR

Tip #4 – A SNIPER’S BEST FRIEND

This handy tool gets put to good use in long-range combat situations. Let’s say you end up without any protection and all you have is a sniper rifle. This will keep your shields in tact and provide extra support under fire so that you are very powerful (but not invulnerable) when taking out your enemies from afar.

Also when things become close range, you can still use the sniper to get a no scope and melee. Whenever in a hand-to-hand fight in a regenerator, you have the higher advantage of defeating the opponent if you fire at them first and then whack. Fire then whack. Fire. Then whack. Or just two consecutive whacks. Just make sure you keep your whacking high, otherwise you’re done for…what?

Tip #5 – EXPLOSIVE, BUT DEADLY…

Unfortunately the regenerator doesnt have the speed to heal you when you are hit by explosives, so the more explosive weapons like Rockets, Grenades, and The Brute Shot are more capable of killing you while you’re in a regenerator. Be wary of that.

High powered or high rated firing weapons, such as the Machine Gun Turrent or Needler, are also capable of killing you in the regenerator. These must be used to their full potential, though. Here’s an example of me using a grenade to its fullest potential…

Not so safe now, are you?

 

Notes:

– Using the regenerator as an added element of surprise in long-range battles works great. So does staying with a teammate and actually using the regenerator selflessly to heal.

– You can still die under fire by BR’s and/or Carbines. Needlers are the quickest and most effective weapons when playing against someone in a Regenerator.

– The Regenerator also lasts a total of 20 seconds.

 

Teabag Prevention Bonus Tip!…THE FLARE

FLARE

Tip #6 – OH TAKE A LOOK AT ME NOOOOOOOOOOW!

Much like Phil Collins, The Flare is taken out of basically all of matchmaking – so this tip will be mostly for you custom matches fanatics. We see too many people misusing these, so here’s how to be smart about The Flare.
The Flare obviously takes out your vision. That is its only function. What you’re left with after you deploy or are faced with a Flare is that it does not take out your radar and your reticule or crosshair. The crosshairs will still turn red when an enemy is in them. Take advantage of this when under the Flare’s warming light. Stop looking in front of you and use only your radar and crosshair. This is the best defensive tactic in a Flare situation aside from just leaving the affected area.

 

Tip #7 -DON’T LOOK AT ME WHILE I’M SHOOTING YOU

When you have a short ranged weapon or uber powerful one, use the Flare to disorient your opponent, but pay attention to where they are or where they are heading because you will be slighlty blinded yourself. So once the Flare is in effect, blast away my friend.

The Flare is also very effective in large groups or flag/bomb games. See a bunch of people guarding the flag? Throw the flare down. By the time the Flare’s gone, their flag is too. Just make sure to divert your own eyes – the Flare will blind the player who throws it, too (we can’t stress this enough).

Things to Remember

1. Your Bubble Shield will help you get places unharmed. Not camp out.

2. Bubble Shields will protect against vehicles’ weapons, not the vehicles themselves. Use this to defeat vehicles.

3. Whack off inside a Regenerator.

4. Needlers will kill people in Regenerators. So will Rockets. And Sniping. And well-thrown Grenades.

5. Flares will blind you too, so make sure you’re looking at the right stuff – Your Radar and Your Crosshair.

 

 

This week’s Teabag Prevention article was written by:

 

 

 

This week’s Teabag Prevention article, as always, was edited by:

 

 

For any comments, suggestions, or inquiries please email us at:

TeabagPrevention@gmail.com

And don’t forget to add us on myspace at:

www.myspace.com/teabag_prevention