Trailer Trash Heap Battleship, Twixt, Tower Heist, & Red Tails

Kyle Kriner here, my friends! Did you miss me? Of course you did. I went ahead and took a breather so you guys could absorb all the cool Comic Con stuff that was happening on the site. And if you think I was neglecting my loving fan base or slacking off, well take this! I’ve barraged you guys with trailers. Some good, some great, some….meh, but they’re all there. I hope you’re as excited as I am. Chances are you’re not, but I can tell myself whatever I want. Hasta la vista, Geekscapists!

Margin Call

I’m extremely excited here mostly because I get to see Sylar on the big screen. He’s always fun to watch. Other than that, we get a really cool cast who all seem to fit well into this film. The plot has a huge scope to it, as what seems to be our country’s financial apocalypse looms upon us. In the movie I mean. It’s all very mysterious and needless to say I’m really looking forward to it.

Pearl Jam Twenty

I never was really a Pearl Jam fan, but for anyone who is, I’m sure this gives you tingles up your spine. Maybe people who are unfamiliar with their music (me) can learn a thing or two from this film as well. Not to mention Cameron Crowe is directing. C’mon, stop making documentaries and get working on the Say Anything sequel, Cammy!

Brighton Rock

I know I’m supposed to be intrigued and amazed by the acting, or the score in the background, or this mysterious story they’re trying to tell. But all I really saw was a sappy story beneath a bunch of conspiracy stuff. At least I think so. Either way, the trailer tried hard but still could not keep my attention. You’re on your own with this one, folks.

Laught at My Pain

Kevin Hart is a comedian I’ve actually liked for a while. His stand ups are humble, honest, and hilarious. He doesn’t spend his whole set talking about white and black, he uses most of it embarassing himself, which is a breath of fresh air. We don’t get anything new as far as how to make trailers, but at least we know we’ve got some good Kevin Hart stuff to look forward to.

Mozart’s Sister

Well, you guys all know how much I adore a good period piece with subtitles. Ugh. So Mozart’s sister was also a child prodigy, but since she was a girl no one cared, or something like that. I was half asleep cut me a break. I didn’t tell the trailer to be that boring.

One Fall

I really like this trailer. It’s certainly a more light hearted film than Unbreakable, and it’s similar to but more epic than Phenomenon. I think it will be a treat to see what this guy actually does with his abilities. No matter what, this movie has good things going for it, and I’m interested to see where they take it.

Dirty Girl

The trailer is funny, and definitely comes across as something new. I just get the feeling sometimes that all the funny moments were shown in the trailer. If that’s not the case, then I think this’ll be a good one. Chubby underdog kid gets the shot of his life with the “hot chick” and adventures follow. I see we also get some Tim Mcgraw in there, which is always a pleasure.

Atrocious

A Spanish version of Blair Witch/Paranormal Activity. I think that says enough, because I sure don’t feel like thinking about it anymore. I’m just glad other countries are using our stupid ideas too.

Love Crime

So we have another French film with subtitles, and it really doesn’t strike me as much more than a Lifetime movie. Well probably with better acting, or one would hope. Still, this looks slightly more interesting than most of the French trailers I see. So I thank it for that.

Red State

Wooo, Kevin Smith is a sick man. Teenage boys getting abducted by some freaky religious convent via an online sex ad. We should actually consider this a PSA. The movie looks nuts. We have some good actors, plenty of shooting, some humor, and I’m sure we’ll get some gore before the day is through. Thumbs up.

Battleship

Now, I’m not always into movies that take place on water because we sometimes get stuck with really horrible movies about computer animated monsters tipping over ships, or ships going out of control, or whatever. But this looks a little more unique. The trailer is definitely a tease, since all we really know is some sort of Michael Bayesque creation is visiting us from underseas. It deserves a shot.

Ides Of March

I don’t know if the whole Ides of March thing is supposed to mean that Ryan Gosling is going to kill Clooney at the end, but the mystery is enough to get me interested. Phillip Seymour Hoffman and Paul Giamatti are basically the best character actors I’ve ever seen, and Clooney is pretty much my favorite leading man. I’ve got nothing but high hopes for this one.

Saving Private Perez

Well, the trailer starts off funny, but starts to touch on more serious stuff later on. I still don’t think it’s meant to be taken seriously. A group of rag tag Mexican soldiers head into Iraq to rescue one of their own? I was shocked that Danny Trejo wasn’t there. How cool would that have been?

Tower Heist

Wow, so this one is interesting. Certainly a step up for Ben Stiller, I think this is a perfect role for him, since he’s getting a bit older. We have a very strong cast, Matthew Broderick included, which is great to see. They even brought Eddie Murphy out of children’s movies limbo, and put him back into crime comedies where he shines. Hopefully he’s not too over the top, I know he’s probably pretty rusty.

Red Tails

Wait a minute, is that Cuba Gooding Jr. in something that matters?? Good to see that. Hopefully from here he can get his career back on track. The movie is actually reminiscent of one of his biggest, if not biggest hits, Pearl Harbor. We have the issue of race as the main theme here, but I think at the end of the day, heroism will be the main gist of the film. If we’re lucky, we’ll get some good action and not too much talking and whining about social issues. Not saying that’s not important, but I wanna see some things blow up too!

Shaolin

So the trailer starts off pretty cool. The Chinese atmosphere with the dojos and everything is always fun and reminds you of great karate movies. The trailer moves along a bit slow when the army invades, but about midway through we get a Jackie Chan scene which completey reinvigorates me towards the trailer. From then on we get some Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon stunts and a whole bunch of fighting. Looks like a good time.

Like Crazy

Eh. Indie romance. Boy meets girl, girl and boy split apart but still love each other. The trailer doesn’t really do much to interest us, it keeps it pretty simple. I think this is pretty much “what you see is what you get”. So if that kinda thing is what you’re into, enjoy.

Gainsbourg: A Heroic Life

This trailer is out there. I’m not familiar with Gainsbourg but he seemed a bit out there. Ok, he seemed crazy. I’m not sure where the trailer is going exactly, but that thing with the giant nose was creeping me out.

Twixt

Let me start by asking, does Val Kilmer have to always have long hair now? I don’t get it. Is he too lazy to cut it? Anyway, I thought the trailer started off pretty interesting until we start getting into all those strange prophetic(?) dreams Val was having. You’d think as long as this trailer is, we would have an idea of what’s going on, but we really don’t. Guess we’ll see what comes of it.

Resurrect Dead: The Mystery of the Toynbee Tiles

This trailer doesn’t show us much except some news anchors talking about tiles with cryptic messages on them. But with just that, I’m more interested in this film than I am most of the longer ones. The concept is cool, the mystery is totally there, and it’s something we want answers for.

Shut Up Little Man! An Audio Misadventure

Um…Well, I guess if you’re a fan of spewing out verbal obscenities (which we all are) then this is a good film for you. The trailer certainly is a bit abrasive though, turn the volume down for this one.

Creature

This film certainly doesn’t have the biggest budget, but based on the trailer alone, they have managed to put together somthing genuinely terrifying. I loved the way the monster looked as soon as I saw it. This should rank in the upper echelon of B horror flicks just for that. Plus, we get to see Sid Haig. What more do you need?? (Note to my dad: How excited are you for this?)

Tucker & Dale vs. Evil

Hot dopey blondes, naive adolescents. We get those in spades, as classic caricatures, but the main concept of the film is priceless. The kids mistaking these two rednecks as killers is an amazing premise, and makes for a ton of laughs. These kids are hurling themselves to their own deaths one by one. This is truly a refreshing take on comedy and horror.

In Time

Hm, I like the idea of time being something tangible that we can give away, or steal. I think the movie does a good job of bringing that to life. I’m a bit more interested in hearing their explanation for stopping humans from aging beyond 25. I’m sure if there is enough excitement in this movie, any kind of medical mumbo jumbo will suffice. The movie looks fun regardless.

The Darkest Hour

I was kind of bummed out at the beginning when I thought this was another M. Night Shamalamala type of Happening movie. But once the true threat of these aliens were revealed, I couldn’t turn away. There’s plenty of action and some awesome visuals. I don’t think this one will disappoint.

The Sitter

I was laughing all the way through this one. Jonah Hill has such good comedic moments, and is always genuine. His relationship with these kids is classic, and the content is super inappropriate. How could you not laugh? I can’t wait to see how he gets involved with murderous drug dealers.