Geekscape’s Random Rants: A Geek Call To Arms. Fix The News!
The news is broken. Geeks you understand that actual news and information isn’t getting out there. Let me guide you through my recent experience that caused me to drink liquid anger, jump up on my curmudgeon soap-box, and shout into the night!
Today I was flipping through channels and CNN came on, Anderson Cooper to be exact. Enjoying the mans pretty eyes I stopped, but I was soon horrified by what I saw. His guest was an attractive foreign woman, a mix of Western European and UK accent. They weren’t discussing policy. They weren’t discussing Sudan. No. They were talking about a YouTube video of a husky whose bark sounded like it was saying “I love you”.
I sat there, mouth LITERALLY agape. It went on for 2 minutes, but the worst was yet to come. After the nice dark lady left, Mr. Cooper teased what was to come next.
“FINALLY! ACTUAL NEWS!” I shouted into the darkness. His tease was another YouTube video, of a woman who was walking and texting and fell into a fountain in a shopping mall. He said “See why this woman is on our ridiculous clip of the day, for a second time! More to come when we get back!”
WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS BULLSHIT‽‽‽ Is this what people consume on a daily basis? I’m glad as geeks we actually investigate stories, get our news and information from reliable sources (are there REALLY any left around anymore?) and can easily tell the bullshit from the bull…fact?
I think stuff like this is the reason people believe CSI is actual police work. ENHANCE! The news is just a morning zoo 90% of the time. Bill O’Reilly talking about the Kardashians (I still don’t really understand who they are, my girlfriend says they are on the picture box) or Keith Olberman talking about O’Reilly talking about the Kardashians. It is all garbage! This is the reason why we don’t have legalized marijuana and gay marriage! GEEKS! I CALL THEE TO ARMS!
It is our responsibility, as the intelligent masses to teach! We are lucky, we see these throwaway “viral vids” on a daily basis. We’ve all received the emails from Mom with the .WMV attachment of the same video some person somewhere ripped from YouTube. We can fix the world!
Here are some solutions I offer:
- Make showing YouTube videos on national news, illegal.
- There must be an equal amount of bias for any story offered on the show. Left or Right. Black or White. Consoles or PC gaming.
- Ticker bars at the bottom are illegal.
- C-SPAN will be on a higher/lower channel so that more people will be able to see it.
- Public broadcasting cannot have advertisers.
- Feedback and question will not be read from Twitter. No one cares what xXthugcripsraiderzXx has to say
Anyone caught violating these rules will be chemically castrated. Male or Female. (If I ever run for President, don’t vote for me…I’ll go crazy my 2nd term [Yes, I’d be elected twice])
When Uncle Joe talks to you about what the random people on Sean Hannity said about voting in Iraq, tell him hes wrong. Show him how the shoveled information he was given by the media companies is just twisted and slanted to just propagate their agendas. Tell him geeks have no agendas when it comes to news. Just the facts. When we read AP.net in the morning we double check the story.
We have a great gift. We understand how technology works. We were the early adopters of services like YouTube. We have a responsibility to teach those how to keep the delicate ecosystem of the internet safe, and AWAY from CNN/FOX/MSNBC etc etc etc.
If only geeks ruled the world. We’d have an actual Spiderman 3 worth getting behind. News anchors who actually understand that Grand Theft Auto does not turn children into thugs.
Help the world be a better place my fellow geeks. One foolishly informed Tea/Green Party member at a time.
